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Thursday, November 22, 2007

I miss you dad

Today is my father’s birthday. Had he lived he would have turned 73. He died last April and yet I still feel that it was a week ago. I miss him so much. I miss the way he laughed, smiled and talked. I miss his advice to me. I miss consulting him before I take any decisions. I miss the way he greeted me when I went to visit. I miss his funny comments. I still sometimes feel that he will walk through the door and talk to me any minute. On my daughter’s birthday last October, I wished he were there. It was her first birthday and he had lots of plans for it, I cried a lot because he missed it. I am still thinking about him all the time and I feel that I am turning to be like him in a lot of ways. I feel so lonely and insecure without him, it is as if something is missing all the time but can’t explain what it is. I feel so fragile without you daddy. I need you so much. I never imagined how much you are the source of my strength until I lost you.

My priorities changed ever since he died, I felt that the number one priority – after of course strengthening my relation with GOD – is to make sure that I please my Mom all the time. To make sure that she is not mad at me for any reason. To make sure she knows how much I love her and respect her. I always feel that I never really made sure to let dad know how much I love him, respect him and how proud I am for just being his daughter. I do not want to make the same mistake with my Mom.I am so lucky to have my Mom and Dad as my parents. They are really the best. They were always my friends and not just my parents.

My dear dad, may GOD rest your soul in peace. I am praying for you all the time and I hope we meet by GOD’s will in Al Ferdaws Al 2a3la in paradise ISA.

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